MYKAD????

Operator : thank you for calling. May I have your..

Customer : halloo, can I order?

Operator :Can I have your MyKad number, sir?

Customer : it's eh.., hold on... 6102049998-45-54610

Operator : Ok... you're Mr Dhaljeet Singh
you're calling from 17, Jln Awan Hitam, Off Jln Ipoh. Your home number is
40942366, your office 76452302 and your mobile is 0142662566. Which number
are you calling from now, sir?

Customer : Home! How did you get all my phone numbers?

Operator : We are connected to the MyKad system, sir

Customer :May I order your seafood pizza...

Operator : That's not a good idea, sir

Customer :How come?

Operator : According to your medical records, your have high
blood pressure and even higher cholesterol level, sir

Customer : What? What do you recommend then?

Operator : Try our Low Fat Hokkien Mee Pizza. You'll like it

Customer :How do you know for sure?

Operator : You borrowed a book entitled "Popular Hokkien Dishes"
from the National Library last week, sir

Customer :Ok, I give up... give me three family sized ones then,
how much will that cost?

Operator : That should be enough for your family of 10, sir. The
total is RM99.99...

Customer :Can I pay by credit card?

Operator : I'm afraid you have to pay us cash, sir. Your credit
card is over the limit and you're owing your bank RM6720.55 since October
last year

Customer :*%#&^$% (obscenities)

Operator : that's not including the late payment charges on your
housing loan, sir

Customer :I guess I have to run to the neighbourhood ATM and
withdraw some cash before you guy arrives

Operator : You can't, sir. Based on the records, you've reached
your daily limit on machine withdrawal today

Customer :Never mind, just send the pizzas, I'll have the cash
ready. how long is it going to take anyway?

Operator : About 45 minutes, sir. But if you can't wait you can
always come and collect it on your motorcycle...

Customer :&^&%$#@! (more obscenities)

Operator : according to the details in your MyKad, you own a
Comel Scooter, ... registration number WOB1123...

Customer :^*&^%^&%^$ (even more obscenities)

Operator : better watch your language, sir. Remember on
15/7/1987 you were convicted of using abusive language on a policeman...?

Customer :[speechless]

Operator : is there anything else, sir?

Customer :Nothing... by the way... aren't you giving me that 3
free bottles of cola as advertised?
Operator : We normally would sir, but based on your records
you're also a diabetic.....

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