sorry

sorry

this is not sane

at current, i m a full time lab tech, working from 8am to 5pm
assumming i conquer from 7pm till 2am.. i m almost a full time gamer too
darn.. i m holding 2 jobs!
this is insane of me!!!

Bipolar disorder

The Bipolar disorder is also known as manic-depressive illness. This illness is characterized by extreme mood swings. A person suffering from this disorder can go from being extremely up beat and energized to very irritable, hopeless, and depressed. As a persons mood swings back and forth, a persons behavior and desires swing back and forth also.

Bipolar disorder derives its name from the two opposite ends of the mood swing described above. The two ends of the mood swing are called mania and depression. Both mania and depression have a variety of signs and symptoms indicating whether a person is experiencing mania or depression.

Signs of Mania include:

Needing little to no sleep and having abnormally high amounts of energy
Speaking very fast and moving sporadically between topics
Easily distracted and racing thoughts
Showing a false sense of importance and power including reckless acts

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Your Birthdate: June 18

You are a cohesive force - able to bring many people together for a common cause. You tend to excel in work situations, but you also facilitate a lot of social gatherings too. Beyond being a good leader, you are good at inspiring others. You also keep your powerful emotions in check - you know when to emote and when to repress. Your strength: Emotional maturity beyond your years Your weakness: Wearing yourself down with too many responsibilities Your power color: Crimson red Your power symbol: Snowflake Your power month: September

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

waaaasted

to come to think bout how i had wasted my one week "holiday" or rather my PRECIOUS 3.5 DAYS leave out from my ONLY 10 days leave per annum.
besides conquering for most of the time till late night.
i had managed to catch quite a few movies: Last Samurai, Bandits, Fearless, Fun With Dick & Jane, Memoirs Of A Geisha
seems like i had spent the past few weekends meaninglessly drinking/pubbing away time/life.. i miss clubbing. i wanna go MOS. the other 3 bros were too old to chiong. guess i m still young at heart. or rather i hav yet to tell myself i m too old for tat.
well actually at the age of 27. *sighZ* really feel that age is catching up.

;S

it's already been the 1 n a half month past 2006
the lunar new year has juz ended
work's fine
gotten increment, gotten the so called bonus which is actually supposed to be our 13th month pay ba.. was pretty contented even though it was juz 1 month. until today bad "news" heard, that stupid numbskull who cant performed, had gotten pro-rated of a month bonus too!! it's like wat the hell.. it's so unfair for those (example me) who had been able to do very much then tat "double-master" fella! well.. wateva, recently been getting praises from my head. rather unez hearing, feeling paiseh, but proud. i definitely have to put in more effort for being so much recognition.
2 bloody weeks from now, i will hav to go ict. the fucking ict is affecting my work! my project. bloody hell! n since i had ord from 2001 till now. my pes status was pending pending pending. from sometime sept last year after medical board, i was then informed to be downgraded to pes c. then i came to know tat it was only temporary. n those fuckers whom i dunno wat the hell they do, did not even bother to send a black n white copy to inform me bout my pes status n vocation. it was only when i called up to find out due to the upcoming ict. then i was been taichied here n there. here say pes b, there say pes c. no one could gimme the right answer. not even my vocation. i cant check on miw. i cant check from the 1800-hotline. terrible efficient. slackers! then i was informed by the chief clerk bout having a medical board nxt tuesday. yet till now, i had yet to recieve any letters nor sms to check online, to do printout of a black n white to inform my company about my absence for the day. the "fastest" efficient was informing me bout my ict, which was actually about half a year ago, i had already recieved an sms informing me bout the ict in end feb. :@ :@ :@
this lunar new year was particularly meaningless to me. for the whole of the 15 days, i had a week break -> 3.5 days forced leave. only a day which i actually go bai nian to 2 of my ex colleagues places. till now, i m totally unbothered by the amount of ang bao my parents had collected on my behalf. last year new year, i had at least been to the chinatown to do a crazy shopping. this year? juz loneliness, i guess. the "dong fang" qing ren jie had passed. the valentine day will b passing soon. it's juz ... loneliness.. i guess.
currently totally addicted to conquer online. after work, nothing to do.. go home to conquer, conquer, conquer. feeling lame, feeling meaningless, but nothing else betta to do.
well.. tot of finding a part time course, certificate of chemistry related to study. but yet to find. hoping it'll b a course related to my current jobscope. whereby the company could sponsor me. :S gonna try looking for it harder.
good news heard in the company today though. a trip to perth will organised by the company sometime in april/may. could b sponsored totally :)
tat's all of bitching. i think i will b back to CO again right after this.
mayb to feed xiaohei 1st. he must b hungry :P
this 14/2 dreadful day for the year will be over soon in bout 20 mins time.
i've been so occupied, so distracted, so .. .. .. that i had forgotten it's my brother bday today ;S

nightmare

was woken up after having a long nightmare (or rather daymare, since the moment i open my eyes, i see daylight)
panting very hard
breathing very deeply

in the dream, i was possessed. i was a totally different person. though now, i could barely remember it, but it seems to be a continuation of nightmare which i had a long time ago.

i hate nightmare
i will rather prefer a dreamless peaceful sleep